i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
