Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I have fence marks all over my body
Randomize
