I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Randomize
