so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Randomize
