I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
you traded sex for a burrito?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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