There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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