I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
All I want is dick and wine.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
