There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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