i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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