Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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