You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
this beer tastes like vomit already
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Randomize
