This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
