i just google imaged poop.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
