I just made out with a guy for $7.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
so explain again why im purple
no
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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