maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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