R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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