she was so not down for the gang bang
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
