I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize
