Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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