I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
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