guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
