pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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