He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
