i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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