Buhtt sex?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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