I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
You are the jesus of drinking
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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