Rock
Scissors
Fuck
you guys were way drunker than both of me
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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