What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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