How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
