she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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