she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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