i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
this just has baby written all over it
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Randomize
