hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
