its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
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