Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
