went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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