so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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