Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
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