I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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