Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
