Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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