they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
