i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
