i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
