Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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