So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
