I wannas sexs uuuuu
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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