why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize