Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Randomize