we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
