Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
she pinky promised me she was 18
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Randomize
